Day 8: July 14 – Seward, the Alaska Railroad and Anchorage

We docked in Seward at around 6 a.m. this morning and grabbed some quick b-fast eats on the boat before getting into queue to disembark the ship to board the Alaska Railroad for Anchorage. The cruise is over, but Denali awaits.

I visited Seward two years ago with my cousin, Phil. He had a hankerin’ for some fishin’, but it was rainy and frigid and fishing sucks like the Tootsie Pop owl, so I stayed in the car jamming on the pod, while Philly donned his wetsuit and caught nothing. We had a much different view that day, but one that included a cruise ship much like ours as seen here from June 22, 2009.

Again, Alanis rears her ugly Canadian head. For the record, I do not find Alanis to be ugly. I could have just as easily cited Anne Murray, Geddy Lee, or Kim Cattrall as Canadian references, the latter of whom I actually do find to be Medusa in Canadian form. I am repulsed by her very existence. Bless her heart.

We boarded the train for the journey to Anchorage. We got the joy of sitting across from a couple of New Yorkers, whom our NC friends had the pleasure of hearing talk dirty - Bret Michaels style - at the table next to them at dinner last night. Poor NC friends. I, on the other hand, had the joy of sitting across from Boobs McGhee. She was probably 77 years-old and, a few nights earlier, decided to wear a dress with the neckline down to her navel to reveal the results of her latest procedure. Fortunately, my back was to her and her girls, so I did not have to partake in the visual joy that would only have served to haunt me in my deepest REM sleep. However, at the relentless urgings of my NC and Peoria tablemates, I peered to my right as she left the dinner table and caught a glimpse. She may as well have had a neon sign beaming atop her forehead with, “Boobs below” and an arrow pointing down to her sternum. There was little left for the imagination and I just know she was praying for a wardrobe malfunction, which, thankfully did not materialize. And, of course, I saw her everywhere after that attempting to beckon me with her withered old siren song. I think God likes to mess with me for his own amusement. And I never slept again…

So after 135 photos and 4 ½ hours, we made it to Anchorage and went to the Moose’s Tooth, which the locals boast has the best pizza in town. I’ll be the judge of that, if you don’t mind, precious Anchorageites. It was better than virtually all of our boat food, but didn’t compare with Giordano’s in Chicago or Hernando’s in Fraser, CO. That’s right Magill’s…you get a shout out. Boat food is bad. Mmmmkay?

Now we’re chillin’ in the hotel before boarding the Alaska Railroad again tomorrow morn at 8:15 a.m. en route to Denali National Park. That is all.

Peruse today’s photos HERE. I double dog dare you. Don’t make me triple dog dare you, Schwartz/Christmas Story style.